I get so tired of being around fake people, you know? It’s just that these coupons I have for the wax museum are way too good value NOT to use.

Hey guys! Looking for something? Try this link!

I’m so polite, whenever I use Google Search, I always say please. Example: “Lyrics to ‘Party in the USA’ by Miley Cyrus, please.”

You know you’re getting old when you turn 50.